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3 April 1894 — Ca’ Capello, Venice | |
Tuesday. 3rd April [1894]. My fears are justified! I went to the studio as usual & came home by 2.30. I found that Cini had just been to see Henry & was gone. He had told him that a swelling he has in the groin is a tumour which ought to be treated at once & he advised him to go off to England without loss of time to see Sir Henry Thompson. Henry had tried to persuade Cini that he would go at the end of the month or in a week. As I wanted to be quite sure of Cini’s orders I walked back at once to his house at S. Tomà & asked to see him. He was happily at home & saw me after a very few minutes’ delay. He repeated to me what he had said to Henry—& that he thought he ought to leave for London with the shortest possible delay. He said he rather suspects a malignant tumour & spoke of an immediate operation—& that 8 days later it might be too late. I was very much upset—& he kindly tried to soothe & assuage me– In order to gain time to recover myself I led him on to speak of Miss Woolson’s suicide. He said he now plainly sees that it was premeditated & that she wished to have poisoned herself. He said she had no influenza & no fever but he thought her so strange from the first moment that she had called him in that he gave positive orders that she was never to be left alone. Cini also said he thought Dr Baldwin of Florence ought to have given him a hint as to Miss Woolson’s queer state of mind when they had met this winter at the Bronson’s house. After this talk I was a little calmer & rushed back home– Persuaded Henry to settled to start for Milan tomorrow leaving Ola in charge of the house & our guests—& I sat about giving orders to pack & to tell Nety Montagu what had happened. It was just lunch time & we had invited Lady Wilfreda & Mr Biddulph & so one had to talk & appear unconcerned. When they were gone I told all the others & broke down again. I can hardly believe in the dreadful thing just as we were so happy with our silver wedding! & having such nice friends & Henry seeming so very well! I am bewildered. Poor Francie Guest was very sympathetic but I had to set to work & be brave & begged them all not to pity me. I went with Ola to sort out things for the journey. We determined to take Bertha the cook & the footman with us. Henry took Nety & Francie to the Mosaic works, & the former went to see the Montalba family. I went & sat with Nety in her room & sewed my jewels together in washleather to carry round my neck on the journey. Mr Dyer & Pss Olga of Montenegro dined with us & at last at 10.30 we could go to bed tho’ I got little sleep. We telegraphed this afternoon to have our house got ready in London for Saturday. | |
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